Difficult Crossword Hints?: BLUES CLUES

Dear Readers,
One of my (two) New Year's resolutions is to blog at least once a month. Here's the first post of hopefully many! Thank you for bearing with me while I got my life together this past semester--I look forward to blogging again. :) To kickstart my blog renewal, I decided to post something I wrote yesterday on my ride home from an interview. Happy reading!



I am currently sitting in an Amtrak train listening to two very loud (albeit decently educated, as far as I can tell) women sitting behind me talk about crocodile purses and misplaced car keys. I tried to work on my book of USA Today crossword puzzles, but they are just way too hard. I put it away after a five-minute stare-down with the clue “Horsewoman who barely made it through town.” What does that even mean? (If anyone reading this has absolutely any idea—without cheating by looking it up on Google—please, please let me know.) How crosswords can have a clue like that and in the same puzzle come up with something as easy as 6-Down: “Stitched” (The answer has 4 letters and the third one is W. I dare you to come up with it.) just baffles me.

I’m pretty good at crosswords. I’m by no means a master of the New York Times (I can get about two clues on a good day, and the first time I even attempted to tackle the Sunday puzzle was also the last time), but I can always eke at least a few answers out of the more challenging ones from my school newspaper. And I love the triumphant feeling that emerges when I get a clue that’s obviously a trick question, or a clue that I know most people my age wouldn’t get (I have my mother’s avid interest in 1940s screen actors and my dad’s knowledge of classical composers to thank for those answers).

The only problem with doing crosswords, though, is that it is an unheralded activity. When I complete an entire puzzle (a rare event, admittedly), the only person I can show it off to is myself. I can’t just go up to random people shoving my conquest in their faces like, “look what I just did!” I tried showing off to my family, but my sisters’ empty “greaaats” were devoid of the admiration I so desperately craved.

The praise I want for my crosswords isn’t necessarily the praise I deserve. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people say “I can’t do crosswords. I’m just so bad at them.” What they don’t realize is that mastering the art of crossword puzzles is actually something quite easily achievable, even by the least crossword-fluent person. You just need to keep in mind a few very basic rules of the CWP and, with a little practice, anyone can become a crossword champ. So, instead of sitting on the Amtrak becoming frustrated at difficult clues and chatty menopausal women, I will be helping my readers become good at crossword puzzles. You’ll soon realize that tackling a crossword puzzle is 10% knowledge, and 90% cognitive restructuring.

Ten Tips to Tackle Crosswords

1. If the clue is plural, the answer will always be plural. (ex: “Birds of peace” =DOVES). When I’m stuck on a clue, if it’s plural I’ll always go ahead and put an S in the last box.
2. When a clue has any abbreviated word in it, the answer will always be abbreviated. (“Corp. VIP”=CEO)
3. “(word) in (a country or foreign city)” means they are looking for that word in that country or city’s native language (“Water in Mexico”=AGUA). Also, if a clue has one word in a foreign language, the answer will be in that language (“Place for a chapeau”=TETE).
4. If you know an answer has something to do with butter or margarine, but it’s only 4 letters, the answer is OLIO. Crossword puzzlers seem to like this word for some reason, and it crops up fairly often.
5. A clue with a ? at the end of it means that the answer is in some way witty, punny, or clever (ex: Giraffe’s extremity? TALL TAIL)
6. “Or” indicates a singular answer (“Nicholson or Black” = JACK), while “and” tells you that the answer is plural (“Nicholson and Black”=JACKS)
7. When a crossword has several long, punny answers, they usually are structured similarly. For example, two clues in the same puzzle may be “Chubby feline” (FAT CAT) and “rotund oinker” (BIG PIG). When you get one answer, you can most likely use that format as a template for the others.
8. Look at the clue in different ways. Crosswords usually use words differently from what you would expect; for example, I just now came across the clue “It’s usually a drag.” I was thinking of events that are boring, like Bridge or C-SPAN. Nope—the answer is BUNT. (Note: I had to look that up.)
9. Like OLIO, some answers are used ad nauseum. From my experience, these are three of the most popular crossword puzzle clues and answers:
1. Future atty.’s exam: LSAT (note the abbrev.!)
2. Sitarist Shankar: RAVI
3. Tolkein tree: ENT (but all those LOTR fans out there would know that without my help!)
10. Finally, my absolute least favorite part of crossword puzzles is the quip. According to the definition that Google just texted me, a “quip” is a witty remark. Crosswords will sometimes throw in three agonizingly long answers that each spans the breadth of the puzzle, and the only clues you have to go by are “Beginning of a quip,” “middle of a quip,” and “end of a quip.” I still have found no good way to tackle these clues, besides getting as many intersecting answers as possible. I hate quip clues, and I always will.

There you have it. Ten easy lessons to keep in mind when tackling crossword puzzles. You’ll soon realize that they’re not nearly as hard as you once thought. For nerds like me, there’s nothing quite like the satisfaction of figuring out a challenging crossword answer. I hope I’ve convinced at least some of you to pick up the newspaper and try the crossword; once you learn the shortcuts, they’re actually fun—I promise!